Hello lovelies! It has been a while since I have popped in to say hi and update you all on the happenings in my life. There is so much to cover, but I will begin with the biggest news. I have decided to pursue a talent contract to potentially film a television series about my sugar life. Back the truck up right?!?
For about a year now I have been approached nearly 20 times to film something sugar dating related. I have always declined because I never wanted to feel like a sell out, or in anyway disgrace what I think sugar dating is. Ironically I had TWO offers on the very same day and I had to make a choice. I could not choose both as they were a similar concept. I opted for the production company that I had the longest relationship with. All of that being said, there is no guarantee of a network actually picking this up. In either case, i will go on and be successful because I am driven and passionate about what I do.
So, on to the rest!!
- My dating coaching business is slowly building and i am working on many great projects surrounding that. Check it out! Detroit Date Coach
- I am still writing twice a month for Singles Warehouse all about sex and dating.
- I haven’t sugar dated in about a year! I have been taking stabs at regular dating, but alas, sugar is calling me….I think.
- I will be appearing on a local news program tomorrow to discuss dating advice, with a doctor that I now work with. I am super excited to be gaining some exposure here in Detroit.
Needless to say, I am a very busy woman these days. I have no idea what is to come, but I feel ready to take on my dreams…no matter how big they are!!
When I set out in sugar dating a few years ago, I did it as I do everything else in life. I did my homework. I studied the best sites and honed my skills in the lifestyle, arrangements and negotiation. Little did I know that my dip into the sugar bowl would be one of the greatest lessons of my life. I traveled, received excellent business advice and most importantly I found out who I really am. If you are a girl looking to start sugar dating, there are some things you need to know before you start.
- Know your worth. You are not something to be bought and sold. You are a human being with needs, desires and a brain. Anyone can walk the streets and sell their orifices to random strangers. Use your damn brain and be better than that. Always be up front about what you need, what your expectations are and ask for the same.
- Cash is not king. In fact, forget about the money. Money only rents happiness. For a time it can and will provide you with “things”, but those things are not forever. Know the difference. Also don’t choose sugar dating as a way out of personal debt or desperation for money. That’s just sad.
- Shoes don’t pay the bills. Nor do they help you in your career or to save for the future. Get a savings account and don’t be frivolous. Invest if at all possible.
- Yes you can fall in love, but that is highly unlikely. Most sugar daddies are married and they are not leaving their wife, no matter what they say. Do fall in “like” however.
- Learn to negotiate. If you want this life, you have to ask for it. You have to be comfortable enough to explain why you place value on what you bring to the table.
- Have a buddy. Find another sugar baby so you have someone to talk to about your life. A lot of times your regular friends will just not understand. I created a whole network of women across the world for this purpose. Email me and I will send you an invite.
- Toughen up. Not everyone in sugar dating has the best intentions. There are men that are true predators that use sugar dating sites, just like in the regular dating world. You will be asked things and told things that will make you cringe. I have been offered porn, plastic surgery and to board planes with no questions asked. All of which I said no to by the way.
- Be a sponge. Learn everything you possibly can from the people you meet. If possible, choose sugar daddies that can provide mentorship in addition to allowance.
- Know who you are. When your days are done in sugar dating, you should not walk away so changed that it is a 180 from who you once were. Be smarter, wiser and worldlier of course, but do not let it harden you.
- Like whom you date. Don’t just jump at men because they have money. For every man you turn down, there are 20 behind him. Choose men that you are actually attracted to on some level. Whether it is physical or intellectual, hold out for the whole package. This especially applies to sex. If you are not attracted, keep your damn clothes on.
This is not a lifestyle for the faint of heart. If you are not careful, it will chew you up and spit you out. It can also be extremely rewarding and educational on a number of levels. If you do choose to delve into the world of sugar, do it with some smarts. Surround yourself with opportunity and except it gracefully.
I think there are two types of women when it comes to giving oral sex. Those who love to tease their man and love to see him sputter under her control. And then the other ones who would have nothing to do with that, as it is sinful and dirty in some way (that’s the minority of women, I hope!)
And I also believe that the way someone thinks about oral sex shows a lot about their personality, in a way. Am I over thinking this? Not really. The person who will willingly do this without hesitation will be the lady who enjoys pleasing her man and she feels empowered, in a way, by doing so. At first it may seem that the woman would feel that is being submitted to something, given the fact that the man lays there waiting to be pleased.. However, I propose that oral sex gives the woman a lot of power and control. She has her man literally by the penis and she is singlehandedly responsible for creating immense pleasure for him. At that time he is subject to her whims and she has the upper hand. Think, ladies, how trusting and vulnerable he is at that precious moment. You are surrounding his manhood with your ruby red lips, and you love how he moans and you also appreciate the feel and texture of his penis. And, he looks down on you as you do all this, and you look up at him as well, thereby throwing in some porn star stuff for extra effect.
Now, the second category of women are those who detest guys going down on them: You know, the one that says ‘I can go down on you, but its ok, you don’t have to reciprocate, not into that’.
I never knew what the fuss was all about. I guess people get self conscious. But on the other hand, isn’t sexual pleasure all about communicating, relaxing, and exploring? Then again some ladies may prefer something more mutually pleasing, like just straight sex. I once had a woman tell me she felt weird seeing some guy’s face between her legs, when only his eyes showed (the rest of his face buried in her vagina I assume!). I guess it was too much of a visual effect for her and she kept getting distracted.
Then again its could also be cultural. I was told that Asian women don’t enjoy that, it’s not considered good in their cultures. Or was that just an excuse for me not to go near there? Oh the things a guy hears when dating…
One thing is for sure: Don’t stop giving’em blow jobs!
As always, just one man’s opinion
David Montrose is an ex-sugar daddy and the author of ‘Sugar Daddy Diary’ where he accounts his dating experiences from a man’s viewpoint