What are you a whore for? Part 1

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I get the “hooker/escort” question a lot from the media and traditional matchmakers in the dating industry. It’s not always easy to explain the difference, depending on the audience. Sometimes, regardless of what you say, the question-asker will never fully understand the difference.

Every February I attend an erotic art installation in Detroit, The Dirty Show. Last year I came upon a well dressed man and his wife. The one thing that made him stand out to me was the hint of a choke chain protruding from the back of his jacket collar.  When I asked him what the meaning was supposed to be, he said, “We are all collared by something in life”. Light bulb moment right there, because this man was spot on.

So how does this relate to being a sugar baby? For the purposes of this post, it relates because I had an interesting debate recently about being an escort vs. being a sugar baby.  An escort (some not all) will tell you all day long that there is zero difference between the two. An intelligent sugar baby will not only tell you that there is a difference, but she can articulate that difference. In life we are all a “whore” to something.  Knowing the difference between “whoring” yourself as a necessary sacrifice for the greater good of something and actually being a whore is the key.  By this I mean putting in 14 hour days as an entrepreneur, maybe sucking up to people you don’t care for because they can provide beneficial industry advice vs. literally exchanging your body or sex for money, or gifts.

As an extension of this blog, I run a private facebook group for sugar babies. One of the biggest complaints I hear from girls, new and old to sugaring, is how men are devaluing women and treating them like escorts. Why?  We all know why.  This decline started about 2 1/2 years ago.  Escorts and hookers saw sugar dating websites as an extra income stream or perhaps a possibly more steady income stream.  Couple with that, the stigma that men are trying to avoid.  I have written about this before.  They “pose” as a sugar daddy, when they are really a john.  They don’t want to be seen as a man who frequents escorts, yet they want to meet a sugar baby every other Wednesday, at 2pm, at a hotel, for two hours of sex/play, give her $400, have no contact whatsoever until the next appointment…and call that an arrangement. The “pay to play” mentality is like a plague on sugar dating.  Real sugar babies and sugar daddies are constantly fighting against it.  Perfect example.. a search term that brought someone to my blog, “How much do I charge a sugar daddy to skype”? Are you fucking kidding me???  A sugar baby DOES NOT charge for a call like a phone sex operator. Phone calls are about getting to know the other person, to ascertain if there is further interest.  Stop sticking your hand out for “yours”, before you even proven that you have worth. I am shaking my head, wagging a finger and rolling my eyes so hard at whomever typed that and anyone who thinks that way.

Last week I attended the International Dating Conference. The final panel debate got heated when it was pointed out to owners and CEOs of particular sites, that the issue of time wasters and unauthentic “daters” is their (the owners) fault.  Reason being???  They don’t use their own product.  They merely collect a paycheck and pay no attention to what is happening.  Perfect example of this is the “No escorts” disclaimer on the homepage of SA. Laughable at best.  Raise your hand if you have ever rolled through a stop sign. Of course you glance around really quickly for cops or pedestrians, but you’re rolling through regardless, right? That is the same thing an escort does when filling out a profile on SA. They see this warning as simply a suggestion.  Does Brandon Wade or any of the staff at SA really police the profiles?  Hell no!  If they did, I wouldn’t be writing this post.

Stay tuned for Part 2

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10 thoughts on “What are you a whore for? Part 1

    VeryStupidWhore said:
    February 23, 2017 at 10:09 am

    One interesting thing, I`m a guy and if I ran into you and you were willing to exhange yourself for money, I would call you a dirty whore. Becasue that would make you a dirty whore. And that means I wouldn`t touch you with a burning 10-foot pole. I just can`t believe how many dumb men there are in the world. they give money to women who suck dick for a living. Becasue nothing says attractive like a used up cum-dripping skank of a whore. Can`t stand them, will never spend time on them. Guys should have at least a little pride, dont be dumb animals.

    VeryStupidWhore said:
    February 23, 2017 at 10:02 am

    The thing is, no matter how much you talk and no matter what you say, it all boils down to one simple thing; You fuck old guys for money. When I was young we called it whores and johns. Now some genious came up with an idea, what if we change the titles? Sugarbaby does sound alot better then whore. But no matter how much lipstick you put on a pig, it`s still just a pig. And a sugarbaby is still just a whore, no matter what word she uses to describe herself. You hang out with older guys becasue they have money. I`ll bet eveything I own that you would never spend 1 second around a broke, old guy who owns nothing. Becasue you are a whore and whores must get paid, that`s the point of it all. But I know you don`t understand, in your world you are probably a strong independent woman who doesn`t suck dick for money at all. Too bad for you that you are just a simple whore to everyone else.

    IvyWin said:
    February 6, 2014 at 8:20 pm

    Its so nice to feel (if only via the www) connected to a group who has such a realistic view on life in general. I definitely realize that my first SD date is totally a ‘John’, yet while i believe i may have the power to get “more” from him than that, I really am trying to be honest with myself from now on, and avoid any more unneccessary heartache (from any man). I’d love to join the SB FB group too please! And I hope you dont mind my ‘advertising’ my new blog here… I’d really love comments/feedback on my first posts! Ivysugar.wordpress.com :) thanks xoxo

    Sugarmom hook up said:
    January 25, 2014 at 7:31 am

    There is really no such word as whoring especially if the reference is money for sex. Even married housewives have exchanged sex for money or favors. Would you say they are whores? Thanks for enlightening many.

      sugardaddydiaries said:
      January 25, 2014 at 2:08 pm

      Actually, yes. Hence the fact that we are all a “whore” for something. More on that in part 2.

      VeryStupidWhore said:
      February 23, 2017 at 10:05 am

      Yes, if they have exchanged money for sex, they are whores. What`s wrong with you people, you don`t know what a whore is? It`s very basic. Married housewifes or not, if you sell your body to guys and they give you money or things, you are a whore. It could not be more simple.

    Brooke said:
    January 23, 2014 at 3:10 am

    Exa, I would love to join the facebook group for SBs. I was actually writing a post in my head yesterday/today about how I need to stop dressing like an escort and start really learning how to dress/act like a sugar baby. I’m more interested in the Sugar world but have no role models apart from fellow bloggers, so I end up defaulting to tight dresses and stockings. (Really need to figure out the whole wardrobe thing…). Anyway, great post!

      Porter Edwards said:
      January 23, 2014 at 6:39 pm

      As a Sugar Daddy, I prefer my dates to dress “older” than they are. While I appreciate pictures of my mistress with a little black (or other color) dress and 8-inch heels, I prefer them much more conservative when we’re together. Otherwise the contrast while out in public is too glaring for me. Now, that being said, if the date is a role play, go for it! LOL

    Porter Edwards said:
    January 21, 2014 at 8:20 pm

    Re-blogging this on my site, Exa. Perfectly stated!

      Nala said:
      October 25, 2015 at 9:20 am

      What is your site
      I would love to read articles from a sugar daddy point of view

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