Both Sides of Sugar- Part Two
“An interview with David Montrose, Joseph Sugar, ZI and Zoey”
Director of Marketing & Recruitment
As a Sugar baby, I would define my role as one that fulfills needs and takes care of a man as he takes care of me. The arrangement should be an honest exchange and it’s important to establish rules, boundaries and parameters up front. When all is said and done, the beauty of the situation is that it can be designed to whatever your needs are. Sex, conversation, companionship, etc… Hopefully a friendship and bond develops. Obviously you would know that after you’ve met. To me, it means that the man gets all of the benefits of a girlfriend or wife without the strings and perils of a much more serious and complicated relationship. In return for his friendship and generosity, I am his friend, confidant, lover, and an escape from the everyday. It should be a truly engaging relationship experience without the fuss. We then have the freedom to be ourselves without judgment.
As a student of life I always want to know what the other side thinks. How do men define it and what are they looking for. I asked David Montrose and Joseph Sugar for their personal definition of “What is a Sugar Daddy”? David’s thoughts are that a “Sugar Daddy is someone who finds a younger woman he wants to spend his time and resources on. He can become her friend, lover and mentor her.” Joseph says, “In all honesty, it isn’t for me to define. Different strokes for different folks”. Whether or not the answer is definitive, why did these men choose Sugar Dating? They wanted relationships that had a measure of control and could fit easily into their already busy lives. Sugar was the way to go. An arrangement also ensures that it remains NSA and a friendship can be built without hidden agendas.
As I think most of you would, I always wonder; what are the best qualities that I can possess as a Sugar Baby. What should I do and not do to catch his eye and keep him coming back? I asked the men about desirable Sugar Baby qualities and faux pas. It’s pretty simple really. Be grounded, have class, be honest and exciting. “I mean we all know what an ‘arrangement’ is but, it’s always nice to be in the company of a classy lady i.e. someone who doesn’t treat this whole thing like a job or an escort service”, says David Montrose. She should also be someone who has goals and ambitions. Joseph would add that, “being a little unsure is ok, but she should have an idea of what she’s looking for”. Above all, she should possess intellect. “No one wants to sit across from a dummy at dinner, much less pay your rent”! That would be my personal quote on the subject.
As I read through the responses from these men, I agree with them on so many levels. I tend to think with more reason than the average girl. No offense ladies. I even have men tell me that I think like a man. Removing emotion and self-serving ideas gets you farther than whining and pouting, is all I am saying. I take into account not only what I want from an arrangement, but what does he want and give in return? I call it the Progressive Princess Approach. Certainly I am a modern woman who wants to be recognized for my intelligence and take advantage of my right to vote. Suffrage and feminism isn’t lost on me. However, I also like nice dinners and pretty things. I will defend your right to choose and I will also tell you that you shouldn’t stop being sexy for your man. Letting yourself go is a crime against all that I find holy. I strongly believe that in addition to the men that seek variety, many are simply looking to capture what is lost or forgotten.
So, what else are you doing wrong? What does a Sugar Daddy think is a turn off?
- Not being respectful of others
- Treating an arrangement in a transactional manner
- Focusing only on herself
Joseph would go on to say that respect would include, “not even just me, but wait staff or other patrons in a restaurant for instance”. I also see this as a tell-tale sign about someone’s character. If she openly disrespects a waiter or stranger, how would she behave in private? Greed and treating and arrangement like “getting paid”, makes me want to slap some sense into Sugar Babies. Taking the transaction out of the transaction is essential to longevity in Sugar Dating. If he wanted an escort, he would just go do that. Also, taking into account the money and time spent outside of an allowance is important. Sure he gives you $500 a week, but he also takes you to lunch or shopping or orders expensive wine, maybe even a hotel suite. I would estimate that my last Sugar Daddy spent an average of $900-$1000 every time we met. That is nothing to scoff at and should be recognized by a Sugar Baby. Part of the mutually beneficial mind set is awareness. If you walk away pissed because you didn’t get everything you wanted in one meeting, you’re doing it wrong!
Stay tuned for Part Three of this interview.
If you missed part one, you can read it HERE.
Joseph Sugar is the owner and operator of Trusted Sugar, an online Sugar Dating website. TS is invite only for Sugar Daddies.